Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Garden Party

Last week I volunteered to host my boss' baby shower in the office. It was a big job over the weekend, especially with my Grandpas passing, but was kind of nice to get my mind off of things for a minute. Celebrate a new life instead of mourning the loss of another. Here are some pictures from the party. It really turned out cute. She cried when she came in and saw it. I guess that means I did a good job.

I used mostly scrapbook paper for the decorating. The placemats and napkin rings are scrapbook paper. And the vases are wrapped in paper. The diaper cake I made was so super fun. I have the stuff to make another one. If anyone is interested I would charge $55 to make it for you. That does include the 2 "bling binkis". It's a great gift to go in on together with some friends, and truly is unforgettable.

Monday, September 29, 2008

In Loving Memory

Our beloved Joseph Dale Smith returned to be with our Heavenly Father on September 27, 2008 after a hard fight against leukemia. Dale had many titles; Husband, Father, Brother, Uncle and Friend, but to me he was just Grampy. He was one of the best men I've ever known and I feel so blessed to have had him be such a huge part of my life.
Change was a large part of my childhood but there was one thing I could always count on. My grandma and grandpa were such a constant for me. Always there to love and support me. He never had to say much, he was usually just a quiet presence in the room. And when he did say something it was often some dry bit of humor that I loved. I've never heard one person say so many funny things.
Each time I came over I knew I could find him in one of three places; the couch, the computer playing solitaire, or out in his garden. He loved that garden. He had such a knack for growing things, it was just amazing. I'm sure he's so happy now. He gets to create way more than just a backyard garden.
Over the past few days I have asked myself over and over "What will I do without him? This man was like a father to me." And the answer is always clear . "You'll just keep living." We will all just keep living. We will learn to go on without him until the day we die and he is there waiting for us with that hug we all wish we could have had before he left. I will never forget you pa, your soft wrinkled face which was the best for giving kisses too, your strong hugs, or your big heart. I can not wait for the day I'll get to see your sweet face again. I love you.

Friday, September 26, 2008

When life gives you lemons.....

I haven't posted any interior photos of the house because it's kind of hard to capture the space in a good photo. Well we finally got our cabinets yesterday and they look AWESOME! I thought that was definitly worth a picture. The other picture is of the living room. And then I picked up this steal at Target yesterday. $15
Yes, it's a wine rack. No, I haven't taken up drinking (although with all that's been going on lately it doesn't sound like a bad idea hehe). I've always really loved the look of wine on display but figured it would be kind of silly to buy wine I don't even drink. And I wouldn't want people getting the wrong idea. But then I found these.
Isn't it perfect?? Lorina sparkling lemonade to be displayed on my new wine rack. My kitchen theme is kind of lemons. I've also been lusting after this piece of art for the kitchen.

Hope everyone has a good weekend!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

A few things

Here's the house with the stone on. I really like how the outside turned out. They painted the inside. I love it so far. It's kinda scary choosing the colors, you don't know how they'll all look together, but so far so good. Just 4 or 5 more weeks. We're hoping to have a welcome home party for my Grandpa after we get moved in. He's still in pretty much the same shape. Still in ICU. His breathing is getting a little better. They aren't having to give him as much oxygen. I think they've given him his last round of chemo. Now we just wait a few weeks, then they can test his bone marrow to see if it worked. In the meantime they are just trying to make sure he doesn't bleed internally anymore. And get his lungs stronger. It just breaks my heart though. He seemed so sad yesterday and he can't ever get comfortable. Who could, with a million tubes around? I really have appreciated all those who have sent encouraging words and prayers though. It means a lot.

I ended up deleting my design blog, I don't think anyone really looked at it anyway. haha. It was just kinda tough trying to keep up on two blogs. So i'll be posting design bits here and there on this blog. Hope nobody minds. Sorry my blog has been a little depressing lately. Happy wednesday to everyone!

Um, we already knew that.

As if we needed confirmation.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Better odds

We had a meeting with the doctor on Wednesday to discuss the options for my Grandpa which were A. Start chemotherapy or B. Let him pass. She told us about a new treatment plan they have for patients over 60. They give them 2 chemo meds, Atra and Diarubicin. And after 6 years 84% of people were still living. That's a HUGE number. We decided as a family that we would give this a shot. If he was only going to be able to live for 6 months or a year after treatment it might not be worth it but 6 years is a long time. So we explained it to my grandpa and asked him if he would try it with us and he nodded his head yes.
Granted, we have a few more road blocks to get over like the bleed in his brain and lungs. His body is only getting rid of 1/10 of the fluid they are putting into him which is really bad, so they had to set him up on dialysis yesterday. Hopefully he'll only need to have that for a few days. He also has a heart murmer that they're giving him a shot for this morning. It's just one thing after another. I know more about cancer now than I've ever wanted to know in my life.
The good news is, he's very alert and responding well to us. He nods yes and no and squeezes hands. I can even understand a lot of the stuff he is trying to mouth (he can't talk because he has tubes down his throat). He even smiled and winked at me a few times yesterday which really gave me a much needed mood boost. Yesterday he sat up all by himself and supported himself with his arms for 15 minutes yesterday. That may not seem like a big deal, but it's huge for him! As for me, things are still just as hard. You'd think there wouldn't be any tears left, but they just keep coming. I'm trying to constantly remind myself that if it is the Lords' will to take him now that it is just part of the plan, and that i'll get to be with him again someday. But it's so hard getting past your own selfish ways to look at it in that perspective. All I can think of is how I'm not ready for him to be gone. I really appreciate anyone who's had us in their thoughts and prayers.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Acute Promyelocytic Leukemia

Our worst fears were confirmed. We went for a meeting yesterday afternoon (i can't believe it was just yesterday, it feels like a week ago) with my grandpa's doctor and they diagnosed him with Acute Leukemia. They told us that with the chemotherapy treatments that he would have a 50% chance of living if he could make it through the treatments. If he didn't do the chemo then he would die in a few days. So they started him on the chemo right away and transferred him to LDS hospital. We were finally able to get in touch with my dad (he lives in Alaska) and I delivered the bad news. I'd have to say that was probably the #1 hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life. Tell my own father that his dad has cancer and may not live long so he better hurry and get here or he might not have a chance to say goodbye. And then listen to him cry and tell him how sorry I am.
I was there till about 9:30 and left to go home. At 1:30am my uncle called and said he had taken a turn for the worse and the doctors didn't think he was going to make it through the night, so we rushed there. He had bled into his brain and lungs and was fighting the nurses on the oxygen. They finally got him to settle down and he went stable. We were able to go home and he's been in a stable condition all day. Right now they are trying to make sure the bleeding doesn't get worse, and to get his blood cell counts up. But it is so so hard. It just really is so amazing how fragile life is. He was fine a week ago but this type of cancer just moves so rapidly. And even though I've told him so many times how much I love him, I hope I can just have one more chance (or a hundred) to really give him a great big hug and kiss and let him know how much he means to me. He's hanging in there though. He's overcome a 13% chance of living in the past. We've got better odds this time around. But make sure you tell that someone how much they mean to you because things can change so quickly.
I know this is so much information but it feels good to type it out ferociously.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Beautiful Home

It's been awhile since I posted about our house. It's really comin along. They just laid the tile and will probably start painting this week. You can see they stucco'd the outside and will probably put the stone on the bottom of the house this week too. It's so fun watching the process. I've really seen the OCD side of me come out though. Sometimes we go there more than once a day. It's a good thing it's close by or we would be wasting A LOT of gas driving there.

Parents for a Day

My friend Hannah asked a couple weeks ago if we would be willing to watch their little boy overnight so they could go enjoy their 5 year anniversary at Snowbird. I was honored that she would trust us with their childs life :) Caden was an angel. He didn't cry once and was just such a little sweetheart. It's us that was the problem. We picked up a pizza and went to the park. He played and we enjoyed the beautiful weather. We went back home and stuck in Cars. Man, he was just entranced for the full 2 hours of the movie. When it was over I picked up the blanket off him to find a nice surprise. He had pee'd so much he soaked through his diaper, shorts and onto the couch. Literally, soaked. That's when you know you aren't ready for a kid, when you can't even remember to change a diaper. When I told her what happened she said she thinks it is his diapers. But I think she was just trying to make me feel better. Don't worry Hannah, we cleaned everything up. Glad you guys had a nice time!! And congrats on your anniversary.

My Grampy Part 2

I had quite a sad weekend. My uncle called me Saturday and said that my grandpa was sick. He started coughing up blood, so they took him to the hospital to have him checked out. First they thought he had a blood clot, then they thought he had pneumonia. So they gave him an antibiotic and sent him home. Well soon after they got back home the hospital called back and told him he had leukemia. Well that's a huge scary word, and I really just love this grandpa to pieces. He's the one I posted about a couple posts down. So I literally cried for 2 hours straight. Now the doctors aren't even sure if he has leukemia. They just can't figure out why his blood is so thin. They took him off the antibiotic for his pneumonia to see if they could get his blood to clot and if it doesn't get better by tomorrow then they're going to draw bone marrow (just thinking of how painful this is going to be for him makes me want to cry again) to test and see if it is actually leukemia. I just found it really frustrating that they would tell a family and a patient that it was leukemia if they weren't for sure. That's a huge deal. We visited yesterday in the hospital, and it's just so my grandpa to be making all kinds of jokes. Something happened with his IV and blood started going everywhere and got on his gown. Well after they fixed it the nurse came back to change his bedsheets and she told him he had a new gown for him. My grandpas response: "I only change my clothes once a week and today's not the day." So silly. I'm not even close to letting him go so I really hope they can find out what's wrong and make it better.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Oh Sweet Sadie!!

Have any of you been to the Oh Sweet Sadie shows? I haven't. But I'm definitely going this year. Maybe I can talk my DH into going with me. You know ya wanna honey :) I've posted a couple times about my good friend, Hannah, and her amazing baby boutique, Hush Boutique. She's going to have a booth at the show, so if you plan on going you REALLY need to check her out. Her baby stuff is so stinkin cute. It's a good thing I have lots of baby showers to go to lately, or I'd probably just buy the stuff for me and my nonexistent baby. So leave a comment, let me know if you've been to this show before. I'd like some insight. Oh and also, if you blog about the show on YOUR blog, you will receive one of these very cool menu planner notepads for FREE! All you have to do is copy the invitation image at the top of this post and add it to your blog. Then email dani@ohsweetsadie.com with your blog URL. She will have the notepad with your name on it at the show to pick up.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Unhappy Anniversary

I'm an idiot. Really. I left for work this morning, drove through the neighborhood, and wondered why everyone had their flags out today. I even opened my day planner to look at the date....maybe I missed something. But all I got from that was that it was Yom Kippur. Halfway into my morning I finally realized that today remembers seven years from the September 11th attacks. I was sad, but also a little grateful that this was something I was able to overlook. Sad because obviously it was such a devastating event that took so many lifes. But grateful that I was able to move on in my life without losing anyone dear to me and with a stronger sense of patriotism. Each year I am able to remember what a great country we live in, and how even after such a horrible tragedy we were able to bond together as a country, united, and move on.
Visiting New York last month was incredible. As we explored ground zero (really, there isn't much to explore, just a big gaping hole in the sky) I couldn't even comprehend what it would have been like that day, working or visiting surrounding buildings. I'm sure we can all remember where we were that day, and maybe we might forget for a brief moment as each anniversay comes around, but hopefully we can always remember what a great country we live in and how blessed we are to have the many opportunities that we do! In the years that follow, I hope that I might not be too caught up in my own life to remember all that was lost, and all that was gained on that day.

my grampy

This is my Grandpa. We were over at their house the other day when I noticed his suspenders. I said "Grandpa, those are some really awesome suspenders you have there" His response: "Well Grandma doesn't like when I wear suspenders, so I thought if I wore these camo ones that she might not see that I had them on." Grandpas say the darndest things.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Something for the Twilight Obsessed

So I know there are a lot of people out there that are as Twilight Obsessed as I am. I'm here to share the grim news with those that haven't heard. For those of you that don't know, there was a fourth installment to the saga, Midnight Sun, the book that would tell the story from Edward's perspective. Stephanie had the first chapter to the book on her site as a kind of teaser. I read it and loved it, and was almost more excited for this book than for Breaking Dawn. But something terrible has happened. (I know I'm being a little over dramatic, but it's just who I am) Stephanie posted on her site that somehow the draft to this book got released over the internet and now she is REFUSING to finish the novel because she's so angry about it. After her comments she releases the rough draft herself so that people don't go looking for it online and maybe end up with the wrong thing. It's just the first 264 pages or something like that, but it's BRILLIANT, even with her punctuation and grammer errors. I love it from his view and am so sad she's not going to finish it. If you want to read the draft you can get to it by clicking here. Now, let us all mourn together.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Baby Owen

The Tuesday before we left for New York, my good friend Janeen had her baby! She was supposed to have him on Wednesday the 27th (my birthday) which would have been fun, but I'm glad they had him before we left so we could visit with her in the hospital. He is such a DOLL! Congratulations!

8 Pounds 4 Ounces
19 1/2 inches long

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

The Big Apple

Wow. New York was SO AMAZING! We had so much fun and saw so many great things. The only thing that could have made it better was not forgetting my sneakers. My feet were cracked and hurt so bad by the end of the trip from wearing flip flops and walking 50 miles. Some things about New York:

A. I knew there would be bums but I didn't really think they would be sleeping in boxes. They literally slept in boxes on the sidewalk. It was sad.
B. Even though the subway is dirty and has some crazy people on it, overall I think it's just amazing. Incredible that they can build such a huge underground transportation system.
C. It must just be from watching too many movies, but I expected to see more people that were really fashion forward being that it's such a huge fashion capital and there weren't. Just average people in average dress.

D. The Statue of Liberty is small. Absolutely amazing, but smaller than the movies make it look. (I guess I should stop watching so many movies)
One of the best stories we got from the trip was when we were getting off of the Staten Island Ferry. We were behind this woman that was pushing a stroller and also had her small child with her. Maybe 5 or 6 years old. Woman talking to her 5 year old son "Hold my arm, HOLD MY ARM!!! Do you want somebody to grab you and kidnap you, and then chop your head off and cut you into tiny pieces? HOLD MY ARM!!" She wasn't kidding either. I just wanted to say Lady, your kid is like 5 years old, if anyone is going to cut him into tiny pieces it's going to be you, because you're crazy!
Here are all of our pictures. There are seriously a ton, but I couldn't choose just a few.
Sorry the picture is blurry. The first night we were there we ate at this mexican restaurant. And this is their menu. On the top of the menu it has all the mexican dishes, and then at the bottom of the menu it says 'FOR GRINGOS' And lists a few American items. Pretty funny.

There were some seriously amazing churches. And the graveyards surrounding the churches were awesome. Some of the headstones were dated from the early 1800's.

Rockafeller Center, Carnagie Hall and Radio City

Times Square

Empire State Building

Grand Central Station

I know they haven't been doing the greatest this year, but we got lucky and went to an AWESOME game. Called up in the 7th inning, Giambi crushed a game-tying pinch-hit home run, then drilled a ninth-inning walk-off hit to defeat the Red Sox, 3-2, in the final regular-season Yankee Stadium contest between the two storied rivals. It was so amazing. I'm so happy I was able to see the stadium before they tear it down.

Brooklyn Bridge

Wall Street and the Financial District

It was cool seeing all the men in their expensive suits, and the security standing outside the banks with serious artillery.

Staten Island Ferry

Chicago on Broadway (so amazing)

Central Park

One of my favorite things in New York was walking around Greenwich Village. I had a guide that took us around to different houses and tells you about them. These houses were built in the 1820's and the architecture is just unbelievable. Just such a cute place. If I were to ever move to New York it would be to here. There is one picture of a cobble stone street I'm walking down. This was the original cobble stone street from when they used horse and buggy as transportation. The pictures aren't very good because it was dark.

Just a really really amazing place to go and experience. If you ever get the chance you need to!